I’m know I’m not perfect, but you don’t need to remind me

Oof! A clean shot right to my self confidence

Dear Larry,

I don’t know what sensation you get out of it, but when you knead into my stomach with your two front paws like that, well, let’s just say it doesn’t really boost my body confidence. In fact, I sort of feel like the Pillsbury dough girl (It kind of tickles, BUT THAT DOESN’T MEAN I LIKE IT). Lie in my lap all you want and have a grand ol’ time, Larr, but could we do without the kneading of my stomach area?

And just so you know, it’s only bulgy and cushy there because I’m sitting down and bending at such an angle that my internal organs have nowhere to go but out.

So there.

I have a very little, super tiny, almost non-existent stomach bulge there because of my internal organs and NOT because I just ate a plate nachos.

Love the healthiest, skinniest, most beautiful gal in the world,


P.S. Don’t think I don’t see your little stomach bulge, mister.


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